Monologue

after a while then i am thinking.
seeing most of them found what they are searching for
their own soul mate.

sometimes i feel troubled.
where is mine?
why haven't i met one?

the one i have i let it go.
regret is moot because i am feeling okay.
blessing in disguise.
i sent you away because my soul told me to do so.

 i do not need any serious commitment.
not now.
how can i dream on that,
when my commitment with God have yet settled?

the dissatisfied one,
say what you want to.
tell me that i am faking it.
i did not even know that you know me way better
than my own self.
yeah, i am faking it.
people say "fake it till you make it"
and i am on my path of make it. 

i know old habit is die hard to overcome
and so much to be done.
struggle makes it sweet, no?
then i don't mind sacrificing thousand drops of sweat.

would i care or should i
when people say that i am out of their league?
not so much that i care than when i am out my God's league.
i have the keys
keys to heaven hell both.
one is easy and the other is hard.
i am the one to choose which.

i am on my way.
i don't care that i am alone,
because i always have Him accompanying me
in every steps, in every traces.

He is a good Listener, He is.
He would have always spaced His time for me.
even in the middle of the night.
He never get bored, He never turns away.
He gives me words of advice and love
uncountable.


He is my God.


The End Of The Topic.